What defines you?

Nathan Buckley is the head coach of the biggest and most famous club in Australian sport, the Collingwood Magpies. He was a very successful player, winning many individual accolades, and has been rated as one of the best to play Australian Rules Football in its 100+ year history. Yet despite his enormous string of accomplishments, he hasn’t yet been able to reach the pinnacle of team success by winning a coveted “flag” or premiership. He’s come very close, twice reaching the Grand Final as a player and once as a head coach, but each time falling just short.

You would think that after a lifetime of striving towards the ultimate prize of premiership glory, Nathan Buckley would be feeling the pressure to finally get the rewards that he deserves. Yes, he is passionately pushing himself and his players to their full potential, but his window of opportunity is quickly fading in an ever-competitive professional competition.

After listening to one of his short press conferences he held last week, I came away with the strong message that despite all of the accolades, successes, and failures he has had, he chooses not to define himself by the events that happen on the football field. There is so much more to his life than that, which I found so refreshing to hear – especially as it’s coming from one of the highest-profile coaches and sportsmen in the country!

It got me thinking about the countless musicians that I’ve come across over my career that are so passionate about what they do, yet don’t realise that it is only a small part of who they actually are as a person. Their whole identity is tied up in how well they do on stage, and their craft literally becomes their entire life. A failed performance means that they have failed as a person, and the implications of this can be disastrous, to say the least.

Whilst music is my profession and an important part of my life, it is still only that…a part. Music is not my entire existence, but is just a slice of a life that contains many varied and fulfilling experiences and responsibilities.

I am a father, a husband, a son, and a brother.
I am a friend, a colleague, a teacher, a mentor, and a Christian.
I enjoy sport, gardening, reading, and writing.
I can’t go without good coffee, or a nice drop of wine!
I love my friends, family, where I live, and what I do.
And I feel incredibly privileged and grateful that I can learn, grow, challenge myself, and become a better person each and every day.

Much like Nathan Buckley, I choose not to be defined by just one single aspect of my life, but view myself from a much broader perspective. Following a disappointing performance, I focus on recognising ALL of the parts of my life that make up the person that I am today, not just on the things I didn’t do so well at. This helps give me the balanced perspective I need in maintaining an even keel.

So I encourage you to take some time to recognise all of the different aspects in your life that contribute in making you who you really are. Music might be a very important part of this, but there are always many more things that create a fulfilling and rich personal and professional life. Regularly recognising this can help keep you grounded and keep everything in perspective. This is especially the case in an industry that is notorious for its ups and downs, particularly in 2020!

So, apart from being a musician, what else makes you who you are?